Navigating the Tenth Month of Fatherhood

Welcome to the double-digit months, Dads! As we step into month 10, let's explore the quirky world of baby favoritism, maintaining that delicate work-life balance, and giving our routines and relationships a health check.

Month 10 is about embracing the evolving dynamics of your growing family. Keep up the great work, Dads! Here's to another month of loving, learning, and a bit of laughter!

Baby’s Game of Favorites

Playing Favorites: Don't be surprised if your baby prefers mom, dad, or even the family pet. It's a normal phase of their social development.

Who the baby's favorite is can change from day to day, hour to hour, maybe even minute-to-minute. It can boil down to something as simple as they like how Mom holds them or how the pet's fur feels against their skin. 

While there are some ways to combat this, sometimes there's no winning. Try to build your confidence here. They will need you and will come back to you. 

Equal Time: If you're on the less favored side, don't fret. Spend quality time with your baby, engaging in activities they enjoy. Your time in the favorite spot will come!

Try something new you haven't done before with the Tiny Overlord. This can be something Mom or your family pet doesn't do with them. As long as it seems as though they're having fun, keep doing the new activity. 

Embrace the Phase: Remember, favoritism is often just a phase. Your baby is learning about relationships and may gravitate more toward one parent sometimes, especially if one parent has a certain way they do things or has the better treats. 

If you agree with what the one parent does, you can mirror what they are doing, as long as the actions and treats aren't creating a bad habit. 

Special Activities: Engage in special activities only you and your baby do together. It could be a unique game, a song, or a walk. These exclusive moments can help strengthen your bond.

If you need ideas, research online! The internet has many ideas and is an endless vat of creativity. If you try something your baby doesn't like, go onto the next! 

Consistency is Key: Regularly spend time with your baby (when you can), even if they prefer the other parent. Consistency in your presence and care is crucial for deepening your connection.

When your partner goes out for "me" time, plan to do something with your lil' one. They will get into a good habit of expecting you at a particular time on a specific day, when your star can shine. 

Work-Life Balancing Act

Work Smart: Streamline your work tasks to maximize efficiency. This means more quality time at home.

Set a time when you leave work. If you have deadlines and get interrupted throughout the day because you are busy, give yourself one day that you work a little later. 

Coming home at the same time as often as you can will allow you to have a routine, plus you're giving your baby a reliable pattern to look forward to. 

It's a Team Effort: Remember, balancing work and family life is a team sport. Coordinate with your partner to manage responsibilities.

Your partner's job is not more or less important than yours. It doesn't matter who the breadwinner is. You are both more than just parents. But you are a team. Each of you pulls your weight in one way or another, and both ways respect.

Home Office Hygiene: If working from home, establish clear boundaries between workspace and family space.

If you have a door and people still come into your office, calmly discuss boundaries and how you feel they are being crossed. Just because you're home more doesn't mean you aren't busy.  

You both have to take on chores, appointments, and other things. If your job allows you to start the laundry on certain days. (This only works if you are not banned from doing laundry)

You can plan for it but explain to your partner that you might only be able to fold the clothes after the dryer buzzes. 

Make sure each side understands the concessions, and it'll be easier to maintain balance. 

Unplug to Recharge: Dedicate time after work exclusively for family, putting away phones and laptops.

This will fall under the scheduling of family time, but it's good to practice this routine every day. Just as it is important to eat dinner together, keep your phone away from the dinner table, too. Bonding together at the same time every night gives your family something to look forward to without having a screen as a distraction.

Flexible Scheduling: If possible, explore flexible working hours to be more present during key family times.

This might be trickier if you have specific guidelines that your company follows, but don't be afraid to ask. The worst thing that can happen is that the higher-ups say 'no.' The best thing that can happen is getting a 'yes' and setting a new precedent for how your company does business. 

Routine Re-Evaluation

Work Smart: Streamline your work tasks to maximize efficiency. This means more quality time at home.

Set a time when you leave work. If you have deadlines and get interrupted throughout the day because you are busy, give yourself one day that you work a little later. 

Coming home at the same time as often as you can will allow you to have a routine, plus you're giving your baby a reliable pattern to look forward to. 

It's a Team Effort: Remember, balancing work and family life is a team sport. Coordinate with your partner to manage responsibilities.

Your partner's job is not more or less important than yours. It doesn't matter who the breadwinner is. You are both more than just parents. But you are a team. Each of you pulls your weight in one way or another, and both ways respect.

Home Office Hygiene: If working from home, establish clear boundaries between workspace and family space.

If you have a door and people still come into your office, calmly discuss boundaries and how you feel they are being crossed. Just because you're home more doesn't mean you aren't busy.  

You both have to take on chores, appointments, and other things. If your job allows you to start the laundry on certain days. (This only works if you are not banned from doing laundry)

You can plan for it but explain to your partner that you might only be able to fold the clothes after the dryer buzzes. 

Make sure each side understands the concessions, and it'll be easier to maintain balance. 

Unplug to Recharge: Dedicate time after work exclusively for family, putting away phones and laptops.

This will fall under the scheduling of family time, but it's good to practice this routine every day. Just as it is important to eat dinner together, keep your phone away from the dinner table, too. Bonding together at the same time every night gives your family something to look forward to without having a screen as a distraction.

Flexible Scheduling: If possible, explore flexible working hours to be more present during key family times.

This might be trickier if you have specific guidelines that your company follows, but don't be afraid to ask. The worst thing that can happen is that the higher-ups say 'no.' The best thing that can happen is getting a 'yes' and setting a new precedent for how your company does business. 

Partner Check-In

How's Your Other Half Doing?: Amidst the chaos, remember to check in with your partner. Share the load and the love.

Ask questions or get communication cards to keep communication going. It may seem silly at first to use cards to talk, but when your brain is full of Cocomelon, and the deadline for work is looming, any steps to help keep transparency in your relationship will make your brain and your partner happy. 

Regular Date Nights: Make time for each other even if it's a simple at-home activity.

Puzzles, board games for two, or some other out-of-the-home activity is great. Cleaning and chores do not count. 

Share Parenting Wins and Woes: Regularly discuss the highs and lows of parenting together.

Good things are often forgotten when discussing parenting, accidents, and everything in between. It's important to point out highlights in your partner and your daily goings-on. 

Support Each Other's Hobbies: Encourage each other to spend time on personal hobbies or interests for individual well-being.

This is a practice in balance. If you take two hours of the week doing something, your partner gets it, too. 

Doing this will create a harmonious respect where each person feels essential to the relationship. 

Pro Tips

• Keep Baby-Proofing: Your little explorer is more adventurous now.

• Encourage Independence: Let your baby try new things under your watchful eye.

• Stay Active: Physical activities are great for development and bonding.

This Week’s Dad Joke:

Why did the baby refuse to play a board game?

Because he was tired of being pushed around... just like dad on a stroller walk!

Further reading: Baby playing favorites

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Disclaimer
_{Always check with your partner and pediatrician before implementing any new practices involving your children. The information provided is meant for educational purposes. Please do your own research, as I have provided my own thoughts, experience, and perspectives on the matter at hand.}