Navigating the Ninth Month of Fatherhood

Welcome to Month 9, Dads! As you become more adept in the art of fatherhood, let's explore the nuances of the baby's development, particularly the onset of separation anxiety, and keeping the relationship sailing smoothly.

Month nine is about understanding and adapting to your baby's emotional needs while keeping the joy and laughter alive. Remember, each phase is a new adventure in the world of dadhood. Happy parenting!

Baby’s Growing World

Baby on the Move: Expect more mobility—crawling, standing, or a few daring attempts at steps. Your little one is now a roving explorer.

From the moment your baby rolled over, their movement would only go up from there. It's so exciting for everyone that Tiny Overlord takes their first steps, but that means so much more work for you. 

(Don't worry if your little one does not hit their milestones. Check with your pediatrician. For example, my little guy took his first steps at 14 months)

Not that more work is a bad thing; it means you're keeping your lil' one safe from the dangers of your home because try as you might, your baby is still going to find some way to hurt themselves in something that is so spectacularly creative you'll never be able to imagine it. 

Ah… there's nothing in the world like parenting. 

But this is where you and your partner can start talking about shoes. 

Shoes don't necessarily mean that your baby's steps become more accessible, and to be fair to babies, they are weird at first. However, the flat bottom will help them take less wobbly steps (but not much; their legs are still building strength, too). 

Some babies will kick them off or fuss until they're removed from their feet, while others are fine. 

(When my little guy got his shoes, he loved them. Then hated them... then loved them... and now hates them. Its a thing they do, so be patient.)

It's a coin flip on how it will go for you. But, if you and your partner talk it out and decide to try some shoes, go in for a cost-effective pair at first. That way, if Tiny Overlord deemed that shoes were not worthy of their feet, you wouldn't lose much money. 

It will be tricky, because baby shoes are so darn cute you'll want to buy them all, no matter the price.

The Babbling Bard: Words might start forming amidst the babbles. "Dada" might just be music to your ears!

Love it. Hearing words start to dribble out of your baby's mouth is going to be a joy until they realize they can talk back to you—that is a different newsletter for a different age. 

If you haven't been able to do it already, this is a perfect time to start pointing to colors, shapes, people, and facial features and labeling them. For example, if you point to an apple, say "apple" and "red" in a sentence so your little one starts to understand that words have meaning. If the baby says "Dada" make sure to point to yourself and say it back. 

The more familiar they are with what word defines who or what, the easier the words come.

Separation Symphony: Separation anxiety can peak around this time. Baby may become more clingy, especially when you're leaving the house.

This is a tricky beast because it will break your heart. 

Whatever decision you make for your child when it comes to separation, it's going to be the right one at the right time. However, know that your baby is going to be fine without you, even if they cry a lot about you being gone. 

What they don't know is that they'll be fine. The separation will be easier once they realize they're doing alright without you for a few minutes or a few hours. 

Which will break your heart a little—it's their first step at independence, and while that's a good thing for them, it sucks for you. 

Navigating Separation Anxiety

Gradual Goodbyes: Start with short departures. Let your baby know it's okay and you'll be back. It's like ripping off a Band-Aid, but with more cuddles.

Here's the kicker: you have to leave. Maybe not the house, but you still have to go someplace where your baby can't find you… but you'll still be able to hear their cry. 

Consistent Caregivers: Try to keep familiar faces around when you're not there. Familiarity breeds comfort.

Your partner, grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins will be the most familiar faces around and (hopefully) won't teach your lil' one any bad habits while you are out. 

Understand that no matter how often you tell grandma and grandpa not to do something, they might do it anyway because they are older and wiser and have raised their kids. (And it’s their grandchild, so they will spoil them behind your back with things you might not like.) Choose your battles. It'll make life a little less stressful.

Sneak out or not? Should you sneak away while your baby is distracted? Some parents may consider it controversial. Some are okay with it. It may reduce crying, but it depends on your thoughts, the situation, and your parenting style.

Make it a positive goodbye: Let your baby know everything will be okay and provide reassurance, comfort, and a laugh.

Make it short and sweet. Some babies will continue to cry even with a hug and say the words goodbye. But, the sooner you go, the sooner you will come back, and the sooner you'll be able to show your baby that their fears of not being well are something they don't have to worry about.

When you make the goodbye short and sweet, you aren't prolonging the inevitable—that you do have to leave. You're giving your baby a chance to miss you and then know it'll all work out. 

Stay Calm: Babies are emotional barometers. If you're calm and reassuring, it helps them feel secure.

Maintaining the baby-dad relationship

Stay Connected: When you are away at work, A quick call or a playful video message can reassure your baby (and you) during times apart. Have your partner send you pictures.

Quality Time: When you're home, make it count. Engage in interactive play and cuddle sessions. Find ways to make your little one laugh; I am sure by this point, you have found plenty of ways. In my case, peek-a-boo was a fan favorite for my little guy. Or pretending that I lost him and could not see him. I made up stuff along the way. Anything to get a laugh out of him. I am sure you will, too.

Baby's First Dentist Visit: A Gummy Affair

Choosing a Dentist: Look for a pediatric dentist. They specialize in tiny teeth and make the experience kid-friendly. Online reviews are your friend!

First Visit: The first dental visit is usually more about familiarizing your baby with the dentist. It's a meet-and-greet for their gums and emerging teeth.

What to Expect: The dentist will check for tooth decay, examine your baby's bite, and look for any potential problems with the gums, jaw, and oral tissues.

Parent Prep: Bring a list of questions, like tips on teething and best practices for oral hygiene.

Pro Tips

• Baby-Proofing 3.0: As mobility increases, reassess safety measures. Crawl on the floor to see what your baby can reach.

• Encourage Words: Talk to your baby often; it encourages language development.

• Capture the Moments: Their first steps, words, or just cute expressions are priceless.

This Week’s Dad Joke:

What did the baby corn say to the mama corn? "Where’s popcorn?" Just like your baby wondering, "Where’s dad gone?"

Month nine is about understanding and adapting to your baby's emotional needs while keeping the joy and laughter alive. Remember, each phase is a new adventure in the world of dad-hood. Happy parenting!

Further reading: First dental visit, Ease your child’s separation anxiety

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Disclaimer
_{Always check with your partner and or pediatrician before implementing any new practices that involve your children. The information provided is meant for educational purposes. Please do your own research as I have provided my own thoughts, experience, and perspectives on the matter at hand.}